User:MrTid1982

Name: Flozzy the Gangster Date of Birth: September 5, 1982 Member since: October 30, 2008 Country: Germany City: Stuttgart

Hallo. Ich heisse Flozzy the Gangster und ich wohne in Stuttgart. Ich bin ein grosses Fan des VfB Stuttgart - die geilste Verein der Welt! Meine Lieblingsspeise ist Sauerkraut mit Salami, und ich esse hundertmal pro Woche bei Subway. McDonalds gefallt mir auch gut. Ich gehe nicht oft aus - ehrlich, gehe ich NIE aus. Mein bestes Freund ist mein Computer - ich bin ein stolzes Computerfuzzi! Ich sehe gern Porno auf fern - mein Lebensziel ist mit eine Frau ficken! Aber ich bin total allein in dieses verrucktes Welt. Glaubst du, meine Seite ist gut? Nein. Wie traurig. Fick dich, und lass' mir in Ruhe!

Early Life (1982-85)
I was born on September 5, 1982, at around 1:45 pm, in Stuttgart. I do not know who my parents were as they abandoned me as soon as they got chance to see my face, but I believe my father was a horse and my mother was a farmer's daughter. I quickly had to learn to fend for myself on the cruel, crime-ridden streets of Stuttgart. And I began to learn the rules of the world very fast. On November 9, 1982, I sneaked into a shelter for VfB Stuttgart players and saw The Young Ones first air on TV having been illegally imported from England by Franz der Frauermeister. That first episode, "Interesting", was my first ever real memory of this Earth. And it changed my life. I returned to that place every week, for six weeks, to see this most fantastic of shows. When the final episode of Series 1, "Flood", finished on December 14, 1982, I realised I had to get moving. My fun here was over. So I left Stuttgart on Christmas Day.

In February 1983, after two months of roaming, I reached the stadium of FC Bayern Munchen. Already I was 5'7" inches tall and 130 lbs, but this may have been due to the fact that I was conceived by a mutated horse which was 800 inches tall and 460 tons in weight. A mane was already beginning to develop on my back. I learned to hate FC Bayern after one of their players threw an egg at me, shouting "Scheiss Schwaben!" So I went up to him, paintball gun in hand, and shouted "Steck' deine behinderte Verein in dein bayerischen Arschloch!" before running him down with a furious fire of paintballs. From that day forth, I declared my hatred of FC Bayern. I left Bavaria with a newfound will to return to Stuttgart.

It was mid-August 1983 before I managed to find my way back to Stuttgart.